Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Positive Parents And A Giveaway!

We all want a happier, more connected
relationship with our kids. 
When I first became a mother I began reading a number of blogs and parenting pages that have guided and inspired me so much both as a parent and as a blogger myself. One of these blogs is Rebecca Eanes' Positive Parents. I always learn something from her perspective on parenting and share many of her posts on my Twin Coach Facebook page

Rebecca writes wonderfully about how to create connected, positive relationships with our children. She never comes across as being "better than" her readers and is always wise and thoughtful in her approach to some of our most challenging parenting moments. The manner in which she delivers this information is so relatable that even someone who isn't familiar with a positive, empathetic approach can easily see how the methods she talks about can work for their family.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Triggers, Tantrums And Time Outs (Or, When Mom Is Losing It)

I'm beginning to realize that it is Mom who has the behavior problem and not my children. My children are just children. They have brains that are still developing, they are seeing and experiencing things for the first time, they have little to no practice handling frustration and disappointment. My children are guileless, curious and love unconditionally. Mom on the other hand? Mom has some issues.

Mom (and by mom, I am talking about me...not the collective "Mom", although feel free to commiserate) has a tendency towards rigid behavior, a short fuse and a need for order. Mom gets overwhelmed easily by too many things requiring her attention at once. Mom has layers of insecurities about doing things "right" and being a "good mother". Mom has lots of habits she has developed over the years that are really hard to break. But in an effort to be the type of mother I want to be and to not pass on these behavior patterns, I am working really hard to break the cycle.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

You Mean Everyone Isn't Parenting This Way?

Me and my family in our happy little bubble.
Sometimes I wonder if I parent in a bubble. My children attend a very progressive, Reggio-inspired preschool where the director and teachers show an amazing amount of respect for the children. My friends all parent their children with some version of empathetic, connected, RIE, reflective, positive parenting. Because I write this blog, I am in contact daily with amazing educators, bloggers and parents who talk about things like why television is bad for young children, or that it's possible to discipline children without shame, how there are no such thing as bad kids, and how taking care of ourselves is the key to not getting triggered by our kids.

And all of you wonderful people who read and comment on this blog or on my Facebook and Twitter pages are so inspiring. It is you who make me feel that there are so many of us who are changing the parenting paradigm, that we are raising a generation of children who will grow up with compassion, a sense of gratitude, and fully knowing they are loved for who they are, no matter what. 

And then I get a kick in the gut when something makes me realize that there is a huge percentage of the population that don't agree with these ideas that seem so irrefutable to me.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Of Love, Gratitude And Cancer

Sometimes being a parent brings challenges you would never wish to tackle, but which end up teaching you more than any book ever could. We all hope we are raising our children to be resilient and brave in the face of adversity, yet none of us hope those qualities will ever be put to the test.  

The 13-year old son of my friend and mentor, Sara Perets, was diagnosed with Stage 4 Hodgkin's Lymphoma last Summer. With her permission, I am sharing her words here. Anyone who has been through a battle with cancer, in whatever form, can relate. But even for those of us lucky enough not to have been touched so closely, Sara's message about love and gratitude is one I think we all can benefit from. 

Dearest Community,
Hold them close, life can change in an instant.
Many of you have asked, and I wanted to take this opportunity to share this letter regarding Freddie's treatment. 

Last week Freddie finished his radiation therapy. It was the last day of his 7 months of treatment. We are now in the phase of remission. It’s a funny place to be. Freddie is still a “cancer patient” but treatment has ended. We now wait and have tests in 3 months. In a strange sort of way I feel like I need a “you are cancer free” letter to put closure on this. I feel like there is so much to be processed now that this has started to come to an end and we find ourselves on a different journey, as after this experience we have forever changed as individuals, parents, and human beings and will never look at life the same way again.

What this all has taught me is about love. Love and gratitude.

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