Sunday, April 13, 2014

Twins And Postpartum Depression: Amber's Story

"Recent research pinpoints hormonal imbalance as the cause of PPD, making mothers of multiples particularly at risk for this condition due to the increased hormonal fluctuations that accompany their pregnancies. The intensified demands of caring for two, three or more infants make it even more likely that a mom of multiples will feel overwhelmed, drained or depressed after her babies are born." ~ Multiples.about.com
There are times I look back on the early years with our twins and wonder if I had some form of postpartum depression. I didn't think I had anything at the time, other than exhaustion, anxiety, irritation at my husband and the occasional bouts of depression I had battled all of my life. 

Whether it was full blown PPD, I can't say for sure. However, given that some research shows that 43% of mothers of multiples experience Postpartum Depression, it's certainly a possibility. 

Recently a mother in my multiples club shared her story of PPD and kindly agreed to let me interview her here. Amber Weitz is a stay at home mom to 28-month old twin boys, Connor and Jake. She is also a photographer and former Photo Editor at People Magazine and Berliner Photography.

Please read Amber's story and, if you are moved to do so, share your own in the comments. If you have resources to share, please add them as well. The more we recognize the symptoms of PPD, the more likely we are to reach out to friends and family to help. 

The more we see our own behaviors and experiences in others, the more we know we are not alone.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Fear Is What We Must Unlearn: Mindfulness And Happier Parenting

I'll have what he's having.
I went to bed, crying, the other night. 

I told my husband it had been a bad day. The children argued often. Our daughter was especially difficult at various moments. I lost my temper too much. No one listened to what I needed. It felt as though everyone, including the dog and cat, wanted something from me every single minute of the day

I felt disconnected, both from my family and from myself. It was my son's special night to fall asleep in our bed with me and when the lights went out he was on the far side of a king-sized bed feeling like I didn't want him there. 

So he cried. 

And I cried. 

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

The Power That Words Have: Strengthening Your Child's Inner Voice

"There is no greater pain than feeling you are not enough. 
Your child is enough, right now, just the way he is. And so are you." 
~ Vimala McClure, The Tao of Motherhood

What if we were truly mindful of the words we say
to ourselves and others?
Years ago, in a class I was taking, the subject of weakness came up. We were asked to stand in front of another person and hold our dominant arm out to the side of our body, parallel with the floor. 

Holding it firm, the other person would push down on it and see if they could make the arm drop. We were all able to hold our arms strong against the physical pressure. 

Then we were asked to think about what makes us feel weak. 

In recent years we have become familiar with the new view on the childhood rhyme "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me". We know that words can hurt. Words sting. Words have power. Words even kill. But what many don't acknowledge or realize is that it's the words we say to ourselves, that hold the most power. 

Eleanor Roosevelt famously said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent". Words themselves do not hold power. But when we believe those words, when we repeat them over and over, when we pass them on to others, words can have a devastating effect.
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